Don’t Masturbate Now

Here’s my flash card of sanity, a reminder to pull out should I ever think that a brief slip back to the bad habit isn’t such a big deal.

Top 12 Reasons I Won’t Masturbate Right Now

1. Masturbation is a false answer to a real problem.
2. Masturbation requires a double life.
3. Masturbation triggers guilt.
4. Masturbation demands fantasy that spits on dignity.
5. Masturbation demands perverted thoughts.
6. Masturbation wants to ruin healthy sex.
7. Masturbation always asks for a return appointment.
8. Masturbation screws with brain chemistry.
9. Masturbation wants me to be a scout for ways to rob dignity and pervert flesh.
10. Masturbation seems like self-love, but it treats the body like a diaper—it only wants to use it and then treat it like the excrement produced in the associated activity.
11. Masturbation drives a wedge between me and everybody.
12. Masturbation is completely selfish.